Hi, friend. Wake up. Grab your bags. You’re going on a journey.
You’re going into a long tunnel. There are no maps.
No one knows how long you’ll be here or what “the end” will look like.
You can’t hack or speed up any part of it.
All I can tell you is you’ll know when you get to where you want to be.
Welcome to being in a transition, the ones when you’re not sure what’s next in your life, and you’re having trouble figuring it out. Or, what I lovingly call “the void”.
Whether this is the first time it happens or you go through this every few years, it is a pivotal moment of reimagining who you want to be and what you want to focus on in this next chapter of your life.
Maybe you’re thinking of embarking on a new career. Maybe the business you started no longer feels right to you. Maybe you’re questioning personal choices you made many years ago.
Regardless of the root of it, the void is unmistakeable:
Things start to feel like “old you”, without knowing why.
There can be a feeling of emptiness or something missing.
You start questioning things you never questioned before.
You are on a quest for something deeper, truer to you, with more passion - but don’t know what it is or where to start.
The void can be uncomfortable. It brings confusion and uncertainty. And the whole experience is often met with denial, and (loads) of resistance.
It’s no wonder.
We are “supposed” to be productivity machines with razor-sharp focus, exceptional drive and relentless determination.
We are “supposed” to know exactly what we want, be on the path, climb the ladder and make the moves. Always.
The thing is, you can try to ignore, postpone, judge or deny it. Nevertheless, the void is still here.
Here’s the wild, liberating truth in this moment:
When the void shows up in your life, the thing to address isn’t the void itself - but rather your resistance to it.
After coaching hundreds of women through profound transitions - and going through my own many cycles of this - I know just how futile it is to resist and deny the void. It’s not about “fixing” anything. It’s about surrendering, allowing this moment to do its magic, and paying attention to the shifts and inspiration within you as it happens.
You are feeling called to change, to shift into a new chapter.
This is some powerful, beautiful shit!
Nature is our most powerful teacher, with her miraculous cycles and seasons, there’s a moment to hibernate and a moment to bloom.
We forget that we are part of nature and we have our own cycles and seasons. This is your hibernating. Will you allow it?
Below are some important truths that can bring you immense comfort and provide an initial blueprint as you walk through your tunnel:
1. Learn to be comfortable in the unknown.
The longer you resist the unknown and the void, the longer it will last. What if you decided that for a few minutes a day, you’re gonna lean into it? What if you met this moment with complete acceptance and approval? Think of all the magic that happens in the darkness of the unknown - in the womb, in the chrysalis. Get creative with your visualizations. I imagined myself as a welcomed, VIP guest in my own tunnel. Practice surrendering to it, and breathe into the discomfort. For a short while everyday, set a timer, take a few minutes and choose to trust that this this void is perfectly welcomed and purposeful.
2. Think of the bravest and wildest thing.
Voids are here for a reason and by the way, it is typically not for quick, superficial moves. This is the time to go to the depths and ask yourself “What do I really want?” Be in the active exploration of this thrilling question and allow yourself to enjoy it! What would light you up - really? What is the bravest and wildest thing you could imagine for yourself right now? As you answer these questions, allow your body to feel the sensations that are coming up with curiosity and awareness. If you start to feel comfortable with these sensations, breathe into them and allow them to settle in with you. You don’t need to make any decisions about anything that comes up yet. Simply, allow this question (and the answers that start to come up) to be alive in you as you move through this journey.
3. What do you know for sure?
A deep comfort in these moments is affirming what is true for you, what you stand for, what you do know that you love, what you do know that you want. Sometimes it’s even helpful to start with what you know for sure you don’t want. Write a physical list and put it up somewhere you can see it often and continue to add to it. Having it next to your workspace where you can see it everyday will remind you that you are rooted and you’ll remember how much you’ve lived and learned. Over time, items from the list may start to “pop” out to you, bringing you closer to clarity.
Finally (and this is central) you get to honor your spiritual practice especially during this time. Connecting to your divinity will remind you that you are safe, cared for, and worthy through all of this.
It will also be a powerful reminder that this void is OK. You will be OK. There is a purpose to this moment, and it won’t last forever. Deep breaths, my dear. You got this.
👑 Want support through a transition? Book your session.
If you’re curious about Shadow Work, I have launched a new One-time Shadow Integration Session that will give you a taste of just how much is possible for you. It’s remarkable how much we can move through with intention here. Book your session right here and let’s kick off your next chapter together.
🎧 New Episode: Navigating the void
How I navigated and made my way out of my own void last year.